broodjets

***Moise said something good about me and Junior interrupted him and said don’t make Anthony sound like a good person (we would not want that misconception to spread around).  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Misconceptions.” Have a great weekend!***

There are a lot of misconceptions like everyone believes everything they see posted on social media as fact (social media is not nearly as factual as the Friday Email is).  This driver was about to turn on my road. We both had stop signs.  I stopped (well sort of half stopped) and she did the same.  She pulled her car up next to me looked at me in this way that if looks could kill, I’d have been dead on the spot.  I guess she had the misconception that she stopped but she didn’t just like I didn’t.  I stared back at her and said some words to her that are not “Friday Email Appropriate.” I made sure there was no misconception about what I said to her (maybe Junior was right in the heading of not wanting to make me sound like a good person).  Moise was saying if he calls this person now, they will get mad.  Why hesitate Moise?  If it was Junior, you’d call so quickly and take enjoyment out of it. There is no misconception that Moise takes more enjoyment out of making Junior mad than anyone else.  Moise tells Junior something he did.  It wasn’t the greatest thing to do.  Junior says that’s not surprising.  There is no misconception of Junior’s (low) expectations of Moise or myself.  Moise and I were moving boxes at Savin.  Four boxes.  I took one of the four.  He says three for me.  I groaned and said give me a second box then.  I do not want there to be a misconception that I’m making you do all the heavy lifting (even though that was my original plan).  I see the first box looks like the lightest of the three remaining; he skips over it, grabs the heaviest box, and dumps it on me (I guess that’s retaliation for me originally wanting him to take 3 of the boxes).  We bring the boxes to the back.  Moise locks us out of the back of the building, and we have to walk all the way around the building to get back in.  If you saw us, there may have been a misconception that we were just taking a walk on a nice Wednesday morning when we just locked ourselves out of the building.  Moise said he had some work to do, but I could come over and babysit the kids.  Sure.  I’ll babysit them while you’re busy or maybe more accurately, they’ll babysit me.  Abby showed me her muscles and lifted a carriage.  Maybe you should have come to work and helped lift some boxes with us instead.  Joshua took my nose off my face. There is no misconception; you do not want this nose.  Moise comes in and sees me tired a little and says I thought you wanted to babysit.  I did Moise until either they fought, cried or I got tired (the latter happened first in this case).  Abby wanted to play “Monsters” which we play often.  I got to be the monster (lucky me). She offered me (the monster) a pancake (I thought as a form of bribery not to go after her).  I told her monsters don’t eat pancakes (that’s a misconception) and they eat little kids.  That didn’t even scare her a little; she simply asked why pancakes aren’t good for monsters?  I do not know too many carbs?   Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, there are no misconceptions that you should be doing it on Fridays.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you thought the misconception of monsters eating kids would scare them then you haven’t met Abby yet. 

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***I had a filling come out, so the dentist had to drill it back in.  As I lay there, I realized that the drill (although not fun and games) was not nearly as painful as the number of emails I was getting that day from everyone at Savin.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Fun & Games.” Have a great weekend!***

Life isn’t always all fun and games, but a lot of times it can be if you make it that way.  I had to go to the doctor for this nasty looking bite/rash on my leg that was expanding seemingly by the hour.  They wanted to send me to the emergency room first.  I went to the emergency room last year for a fall I had do I really want to be making this an annual trip like it’s all fun and games visiting the ER?  The nurse said my blood pressure was normal.  At first, I was glad but then realized nobody ever called me normal before, so I felt slightly offended.  And then asking me how tall am I?  What does that have to do with the giant bruise on my knee?  Is this for like a dating website or something?  If so, I’ll say I’m an inch taller than I am like everyone else does there.  Maybe you should look at how tall the infection is instead of playing games asking me about my height?  I knew wearing shorts Joshua and Abby would question it, and they did.  Abby wanted to touch the bruise and then said “eww it’s gross.”  Yes, it is Abby, it’s not all fun and games.  Moise asked me something.  I just said what?  He asked again.  I said what?  I’m not sure what your question is, not just fun and games.  He says don’t say what what what when I ask something.  What do you want me to say no?  We were on the phone with Junior.  You know sometimes a conversation just isn’t going well?  Moise gave me the cutthroat sign to hang up before he got mad at him.  It was all fun and games, but why couldn’t the conversation end on a positive note? Moise asked me to check something but first I had to make a comment (I couldn’t help myself) and I said why did I have to make a comment?  He said that’s what you do.  Moise said good thing his flight was delayed till 8 (2-hour delay) because he never made it by 6 (it’s all fun and games poking fun at Moise’s tardiness).  Moise was scrolling on his phone looking for an appointment he had.  I said look in your calendar, but he looked in his email.  I said I thought you were organized then remembered it was you.  My friend accidentally left with my phone and left her phone with me.  By the time I realized it, she was home, so I said just swap it tomorrow when you’re around.  I forgot though 5:30AM Disturbed would be blasting and wake her up.  And she couldn’t turn it off.  Well, it’s all fun and games till you hear loud music at that time in the morning.  Junior was having coffee and yogurt together but then questioned himself.  Do they go together?  Junior said that the sound of Moise’s voice irritates him (ironically it is soothing to me).  Abby knows what Tik Tok is.  I told her you’re too little for Tik Tok.  She said no, she’s too big for Tik Tok.  I think she’s right.  Now Joshua and Abby had this game they wanted to play on Moise’s phone.  “Race Master.” It’s a fun racing game.  So fun in fact that I downloaded it and played it on my phone.  Moise says you want to play this too?  It’s a fun game, Moise, of course I do.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet just remember it’s not all fun and games (unlike “Race Master”).  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you want a good game to download on your phone try “Race Master.”

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***Everyone comes to the recognition that it’s time to do their timesheet when the Friday Email goes out (except those who still somehow always “forget”).  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Recognition.” Have a great weekend!***

Many people want to be famous and be recognized.  My friend said she met someone and thought he was “lovely.” I said I don’t think anyone ever described me as lovely before.  Maybe they just don’t recognize my lovely side.  This lady at the bakery said she knows my uncle.  She recognized me, she said.  One thing you should recognize is that I’m a better tipper than he is (not that is that difficult to be).  Moise said he has 143 and minus 40 he’ll have 200.  It was really hot in the room that day (as we’ll find out below), so I sat there thinking he was right and then I recognized that math made 0 sense when Junior started laughing at Moise.  Junior said he recognized his 2 neighbors (on both sides) of him are serious about keeping their yard ultra neat.  He said he recognizes he has to keep up somewhat, or he could look like that guy in the middle who makes the whole neighborhood look worse.  Joshua recognized that one of the monsters I showed him in a picture was crying.  He said why?  I said because he didn’t eat his vegetables, so you better recognize you need to eat yours.  Moise comes in and says hey to everyone (not good morning) and Junior ignores him.  Recognize Junior wants a good morning.  Junior goes into a speech.  I gave up on Anthony.  He has no manners.  He comes in and randomly starts talking like we’re in mid-conversation first thing in the morning.  I recognize that is true Junior.  Moise says I don’t want to sound stupid in this email.  He asked me to read what he wrote. Uh Moise please recognize that sounding stupid is my specialty.  You’ve read enough Friday Emails to know that.  Junior sees me toasting something.  I said this is just a snack Junior.  He says why do you need a snack?  You’re a grown man.  10 minutes later Jealous Junior sees me with my snack and says oh man I need to bring a snack.  I’m sorry Junior, do you recognize you just criticized me for having one 10 minutes ago?  Johsua and Abby said they wanted to go to the library on Saturday and claimed they wanted to “read” there (mind you there is a room full of toys in this library).  Moise said repeat after me “We are going to read at the library.” They both repeated it (but not very convincingly at all).  Monday – 80 degrees in the office.  A/C not working.  Wearing short sleeves on Tuesday is the advice we are given.  I don’t trust it and dress in long sleeves.  I walk in Tuesday and it’s 60 degrees freezing.  I texted Junior to make sure you wear short sleeves, it’s so hot in here.  He walked in (unfortunately was already on his way dressed in long sleeves when I texted) and was not happy with me.  He said why would you send a text like that to me?  It’s freezing in here.  I may need a jacket.  I guess he recognized how cold it was very quickly and to never trust me.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, I hope you recognize that whether you’re sweating in the humidity or freezing in the a/c that you still have to do it.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you think I take joy in messing with Junior then you would be correct.

Have a great weekend!
Anthony

***Last week I told someone something about me and their response was “That’s the one thing I like about you.” Wait only ONE thing?  Take your time and try to at least find a second thing.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Take Your Time.”  Have a great weekend!***

We are all in a rush most of the time.  We’re all busy but it’s nice to find calmer times in life where you can slow down and take your time.  One of those times is not when you’re driving in front of me though.  If you want to take your time, go for a walk at a park or go sit at a diner but do not hold up traffic because you have nothing better to do than drive 10MPH.  I held the door for someone next thing I know 7 people later I’m still holding the door.  Take your time coming in while I am a doorman and feel free to leave a tip while you’re at it. I read that the probability of being born was 1 in 400 trillion.  I guess the other 399,999,999,999,999 people that I could have been didn’t make it since it took this much time to get to the 400 trillionth person I turned out to be.  Junior was drinking his coffee at work and noticed a hair in it.  Junior wasn’t sure if he should drink it.  Well Junior you just made the coffee and me and you were the only ones in the kitchen and between us there isn’t a ton of hairs on our heads so take your time and drink your coffee and realize it’s not an outsider’s hair at least.  Moise said the computer was moving slowly (it was taking its time).  I suggested that maybe the person using it is the problem.  He didn’t like that.  He says when you rush, it wants to go slower.  It knows when to frustrate you.  It has a mind of its own.  Well, it hears you criticizing it and is purposely taking its time now.  Abby took her time to sing “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” to me.  It was impressive, I must say.  Someone told me and Junior that we have the same haircut.  Take your time to realize that’s not too hard to notice (and still try to figure out which one’s hair fell in Junior’s coffee).  I told Moise something he didn’t want to hear.  He said no, don’t say that.  Okay, I won’t say that Moise I’ll take my time to say something worse.  Moise was adding 2 + 2 + 3 on his calculator.  Me sitting there waiting to make a comment.  He says something is off.  Take your time, Moise.  Let’s call Abby; she can add these numbers without a calculator.  Junior says a big bug is back here.  Next thing I hear is “whack, whack.”  Take your time to say your condolences to the bug’s family and friends.  I saw someone in the pouring rain walking without an umbrella and let them know I respected that.  Take your time and get wet.  You won’t melt.  Moise can’t find an answer to a problem.  Moise called Junior.  He didn’t answer.  Later, Moise said Junior didn’t even call me back.  Then he said let me check first before I bash him (checks phone calls) nope he didn’t call back.  Take your time to bash him Moise and check if he called back first.  I was talking with someone about how some people change sometimes.  I said well Junior hates me, but he knows what he’s getting with me daily at least.  Joshua wasn’t happy that Moise and I were talking.  He wanted to talk to me.  Moise when will you realize the world doesn’t revolve around us?  It revolves around Joshua and Abby.  Abby told me Scooby Doo eats these fruit snacks, so she handed me a package and told me to give them to my dog Damian.  They’re good for him, she said.  Uh let me take my time and read the label if these are FDA approved for dogs Abby.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, you want to take your time to do it right the first time.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if your dog is hungry, Abby has some fruit snacks to hand out because Scooby Doo eats them too.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

Moise said he taught me about the stock market.  If you prefer to believe that total lie Moise you can, however, I believe the only “Apple” you know is the red one that the doctors tell you to eat.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Preferences.” Have a great weekend!***

We all have different preferences in life.  Some people prefer coffee and others prefer tea (even if I have the worst cold, I’d never drink tea).  I ran into someone with her dogs.  They were friendly with Damian but not with me.  I guess those dogs prefer dogs over people (can’t say I blame them).  I knew Moise didn’t start something, so I asked him purposely how much did you do of this work yet?  He made a hand circling motion saying “0”.  I guess he prefers to use hand signals.  I thought he was making a circular motion with his finger at his head saying I’m crazy.  Junior was saying there’s a 75% chance that Moise would miss his flight.  Moise didn’t respond.  I think he prefers to stay silent when he admits guilt.  Moise typed he is not sorry for something but meant to type he was sorry.  Well, Moise maybe you weren’t sorry and that’s why your fingers preferred to type that instead.  I called Moise “Junior” and then realized that was a bit insulting.  Abby called Moise at work.  Abby wanted to know how it was going.  Moise says good working so I can buy you stuff.  I’m thinking Abby will say oh like a box of cookies great.  But instead, Abby says a new dress?  I guess Abby prefers a dress over something less expensive, like a box of cookies.  You had better get the shoes and bag to go with that dress Moise.  I called Moise but of course wound up talking to Abby.  After a 5-minute conversation, Moise says, are you done talking to Abby?  I prefer to talk to Abby, but the real question Moise is whether Abby is done with me.  Moise was calling a Savin employee.  They wouldn’t answer.  Maybe their preference is talking to me, and they knew you were calling?  Joshua and I were watching Garfield.  Abby said Garfield eats pasta with sausage, potatoes, and ketchup.  Garfield’s preference for food is a strange mixture, Abby.  Moise said Junior you have no patience.  With you Moise he has no patience he prefers someone who doesn’t drive him crazy.  Abby had her hair up, and it looked good.  I said do mine like that but then I realized I don’t have quite enough hair for that hairstyle.  Joshua showed me his and Abby’s new beds.  Abby said they are big kids now having their new beds.  She asked me if I’m a big kid.  Abby…I think everyone knows the answer to that question.  Yes, I’m a big kid.  If you prefer, you can ask Junior to confirm this.  Moise was on the phone, and I tell him ok I have to go.  I go about my business with my phone and then realize 5 minutes later I never hung up.  I said you’re still there.  He said yes, I want to see if you say anything bad about me.  Oh well, I prefer to say the bad stuff to your face.  Abby dressed up as a doctor at the library and was giving me a checkup.  She gave me her business card.  I was trying to read a book in the library, and she told me that was mean.  Since when did the library become about playing with toys instead of reading?  I must be getting old.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember you can do your timesheet in the library if you want on a computer while you’re doing work, but Abby may consider that mean too.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you visit your local library make sure you play with the toys and don’t get distracted by the books.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***Over the years there have been some strange Friday Email titles but maybe none stranger (yet oddly intriguing) than today’s title “Monster Heaven.” Have a great weekend!***

Sometimes we think we know everything, but kids teach us that we don’t.  Every time I see Joshua and Abby, I feel like I learn more from them than them from me.  Recently we had a discussion about heaven, and it led to me learning about “Monster Heaven.”  I’ll get to that at the end of this, but I was thinking recently how a lot of times life feels like a multiple-choice test.  In almost every situation you have 4 options on what you could say.  The first Option (A) is the one you should absolutely not say but normally that’s the option that I feel has the most truth in it so I just say it.  Option (B) is a slightly watered down version of Option (A) but still not exactly the right way to say something, but I’ll say it to slightly sugarcoat what I said after I realize Option (A) was really off the walls (even though it was still my most honest option on what I think).  Option (C) is just an in-between option that many people will use (almost like being neutral on something), but I never use it because I don’t feel it.  Option (D) is the right option (politically correct) thing to say, and I never use that option.  I hope that my way of expressing myself incorrectly sometimes is not held against me in Monster (or any other) Heaven.  Moise was trying to find a vendor in the system and typed the name 10 times, and it wouldn’t come up.  He said oh I forgot to leave a space between the 2 words.  Spaces make all the difference Moise. Moise was saying anyone who does this is stupid.  But Moise you do it.  He said exactly.  Well, he made his point and used himself as an example.  When I was trying to explain something to Junior he said I was bumbling and fumbling my words.  Moise was not happy at something I said and told me no don’t be serious.  Don’t be serious?  That’s easy for me Moise.  Junior said he was going to go rehearse his singing.  From what my ears hear (and the monsters in Monster Heaven probably hear) it needs a lot of work Junior.  Trust me.  Like a lot.  Moise said he had a class with his sister, she got an A and he got a C.  I said why didn’t you sit next to her so you could cheat off her?  He said the teacher knew they were siblings, so she made them sit across the room from each other (knowing his sister she’d say Moise do your own work).  Joshua and Abby were looking at my phone and saw a picture of my first Boston Terrier Nitro on my couch.  Abby wanted to know why she didn’t meet him.  I struggled with how to explain this to her for several seconds and then (as Abby always does) she saved her best comment by asking me if he’s in doggie heaven?  I said yes and then Joshua wanted to know if the couch that Nitro was on is also in Doggie Heaven.  I mean I’m sure they have couches there (probably much more comfortable than the ones we have here).  And Joshua said he wanted to see Monster Heaven.  I spent the time to google this for Joshua and came up with an interesting photo with all monsters together in heaven.  He seemed like he loved it, but I advised him their monsters Joshua stay away.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, you don’t want the monsters in Monster Heaven to come after you, so please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you never knew Monster Heaven was a thing well that makes 2 of us.

Have a great weekend.

Anthony

***Last week one day Moise said time for breakfast (it was 4PM).  Junior said Moise has no sense of timing.  Maybe Moise just wanted to save his breakfast for dinner.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Saving Vs. Spending.” Have a great weekend!***

There’s always a delicate balance in how much money you should save vs. how much money should you spend.  This guy comes to my home and I open the door.  He immediately begins babbling and right away you know it’s a sales thing.  I stare at him and am about to cut him off, but he keeps going on and on like this is a speed talk contest and he knows why because the second he stops talking to breathe I’m going to tell him I’m not interested.  But finally, I cut him off and said I’m busy right now.  He says can I come back later?  I said No.  He should have saved his breath.  Junior told Moise to bring his big, beautiful brain over for some assistance.  Moise said Junior must want money from me to say this.  Save the compliments, Junior.  Moise was questioning something he did.  I said it’s ok you are allowed to make a mistake (I spend so much time criticizing I might as well be supportive)…but then I said you make plenty of them.  I should have stopped before the last part.  Junior was calling across the room if I’m here.  I say yes.  He says are you here?  If I am not here but I’m answering there’s some ghost thing going on.  I typed “disgust” instead of “discuss” to someone (luckily, I saved myself by not clicking send before correcting it or they would think I’m disgusted by them). Moise said he had to get somewhere by 5.  I looked at the clock.  It’s 5:30 and you haven’t left yet, Moise.  He says ok hopefully for 6 (save yourself from getting a speeding ticket).  Junior was walking back to our office ahead of me and says I’m not holding the door for you and lets it go to close before I get there.  At least he saved me the thought he might hold it by warning me he wouldn’t.  Junior was saying to Moise I want to pick your brain.  I asked how come you never ask to pick my brain Junior?  He laughed and said no comment (he saved us all the comment we knew he wanted to say).  I told Joshua it was my mom’s birthday, and he started singing happy birthday to Anthony’s mom (very catchy but not quite as spectacular as his “Michael Jackson” moves he shows me).  Abby and Joshua questioned my iced mocha. They were making fun of it and said it was too dark to drink. They tasted it and said it was disgusting. I saved myself $7 for that iced mocha, and you 2 are criticizing it.  Junior had a picture of an animal in his yard and asked our mail guy Hugo, is this a deer or a coyote?  I was looking at it too and Hugo says this is what you guys do at work.  I need to come work here.  He said he thought this was an engineering company.  Hugo got jokes.  Well Hugo, we do everything here all kinds of engineering, as well as help figure out what animal is what (like Abby does when she shows me her animal book).  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember I always save the reminder to be sent out on Friday on the day you’re supposed to do your timesheet.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you’re good at telling the difference between coyotes and deer, please contact Junior to assist him.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***In case you didn’t know (by my several reminders this week) today we upgrade from Vision to Vantage (link, info etc. will be sent later today in a separate email).  Today’s Friday Email is appropriately titled “Advantages.”  Have a great weekend!***

In life, we always look for an advantage.  In baseball if a hitter can steal a sign from a pitcher, he has an advantage to know what pitch is coming next.  Speaking of baseball, I found this baseball video game I grew up playing.  And it’s playable on a current video game system so I downloaded it and it amazed me how I remembered the lineup of all the players (this is a made-up game so real baseball players were not used) yet I can’t remember what I ate for lunch yesterday (the advantage of prioritizing video games as a kid).  I was showing Moise and Junior something.  Junior says looks good.  Moise says I have a question.  I said I knew this was going too smoothly.  Junior says I know.  Moise says I have no further questions.  The advantage of this department being like a courtroom.  I couldn’t see my computer screens.  Why?  The plug wasn’t in.  Moise was talking and telling me and Junior to listen.  He says we do not give him enough credit.  We underestimate him.  I said Nah, I think Junior gives you no credit.  He said that is underestimating.  No, that’s worse underestimating would be giving you only partial credit Moise.  Junior said he went to a World Cup soccer game, and it was $600 for a parking space (if you think Junior paid $600 for a parking space, you don’t know him very well by now).  Junior took an Uber (cost: much less than $600).  Junior said the players looked small (the disadvantage to buying the cheapest tickets possible).  Moise says Junior knows nothing about soccer, let me go over and educate him.  This should be good let me go and watch this (and report on it in the Friday Email). Moise gives Junior his breakdown of the World Cup, and Junior says Moise is one of those people who is fooling himself.  Well, at least he is fooling someone Junior.  I guess Junior didn’t like his “expert” analysis.  Moise was asking what # I saw in this report.  I said 212760.  He says 21 dollars?  How can it be $21.2760?  It was $2,127.60.  The advantages of having common sense when it comes to math.  It’s 100 degrees out.  Joshua and Abby have a fun little pool to play in.  Abby splashed me and Moise.  We both got annoyed and then realized it’s 100 degrees splash all the water you want too on us.  The kids saw a bee in the pool and wanted to empty the entire pool of water to get the bee out and then refill the entire pool again (there goes Moise’s water bill).  Moise wanted to get Abby and Joshua to leave the pool.  I told them I have to go home now anyway.  Abby says 5 more minutes.  I said okay, I’ll stay 5 more minutes and then you guys can get out of the pool and I’ll go home.  Abby says 5 more minutes for you to stay but 100 more minutes for her to stay in the pool.  I guess Abby loves the pool more than she loves me.  It was 100 degrees.  The advantages of being in a nice cool pool can’t be beaten.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember it’s to your advantage to use the vantage link below.  Please do your timesheet on time today (when I give you the okay for Vantage) and remember if you need a way to cool off just visit Joshua and Abby’s pool this summer.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***The Intention of the Friday Email is to get you to do your timesheet, but it just takes a long off the road type of approach to get back to that point (eventually) at the end.  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Intentions.” Have a great weekend!***

Most people have good intentions when they do something but other times they have bad intentions.  Ever notice how uncomfortable the seats are at a mall’s food court?  The intention is to make you as uncomfortable as possible, so you get up and go shopping at the stores.  I went to a Verizon store.  The Verizon guy at the store says we must call this number to talk to customer service.  He wanted to talk for me.  He says I’m going to pretend to be you.  I told him trust me you don’t want to be me.  Joshua was eating a donut after his bath and came out with donut powder on his face. When your intention to take a bath collides with your desire to eat a donut, you do both.Moise was complaining that I didn’t do something.  Then I do it and he says why didn’t you do it before noon?  It’s 11:41AM Moise.  That’s before noon.  My intention of completing it before noon was successful.  Moise told me about someone he knows that hates him.  I said hate is a strong word Moise.  I don’t like celery.  But do I hate it?  Not really.  Did I just compare Moise to celery?  That was not my intention.  Moise’s friend Doctor Joe called and wanted to talk to me (His intention was to tell me another long story).  My only way to get Doctor Joe off the phone was to tell him I had 2 kids (Joshua and Abby) jumping on me.  A lady at the park called me over to ask me for directions.  That was her intention but once she saw I had Damian with me, she said, “Oh you have a Boston Terrier” and suddenly the directions she was looking for was an afterthought.  Abby told me her fork wasn’t working when she was trying to eat.  I told her to get a hammer, and I’ll fix it for her (at least that would be my intention, but the hammer would probably destroy the fork first).  Moise said give me a second.  I said ok 1 second is over so I just did.  He got annoyed (maybe he should have asked for a minute, not a second since that was his intention).  Moise’s intention was to type the word cloud, but he forgot the C and put “loud.” Maybe he’s listening to my Disturbed music in my car lately.  My intention was to go see Joshua and Abby on Saturday.  Moise told me Abby will call me tomorrow to let me know when to come over.  I never waited for a girl to call me in my life (this was a first) and trust me, no girl ever waited for me to call her either.  Junior told me about his fancy Saturday plans.  Sounded busy and his intention was to try to show me up?  But I told him my plans were “Go to see Moise.” I’m sure my plans were more fun than his.  The kids grabbed my phone, and their intention was to have fun with it.  But little did they realize it wasn’t mine (I hid it) and they were playing with Moise’s dad’s phone. When they realized it, they quickly put it back, looked worried, put their hands over their mouths and said “That’s papa’s phone!”  And then they tried to point their finger at me like I did it.  Look, your intention may be to cover yourself but don’t blame me; I don’t want to mess with papa either (I’ve had a few speeches from him over the years as it is).  Now I know who the kids are afraid of and it isn’t me.  Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember your intention to do it is good but actually doing it is better.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you don’t do it, I’m calling Papa after you.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony

***Mike Tyson was a great fighter.  Evander Holyfield was too.  And don’t forget George Foreman (although I think he was known more for his grill).  Today’s Friday Email is all about “Fights.” Have a great weekend!***

Everyone fights at times.  Brother and Sister.  Husband and Wife.  Stranger and Stranger.  A lot of things people do (and don’t do) when I’m driving make me want to fight with them but the inability to understand you can make a right on a red light (unless otherwise noted and even then, I believe it’s a “suggestion” not a law you can’t) makes me honk them relentlessly until they do it (it works sometimes too).    Moise was looking for something he said he had already done.  He said he’s a man of his word.  No arguing you’re a man of your word.  We all try to be when we say things, but we forget as we fight remembering everything everyone wants.  I asked Moise what time something happened.  He says 6.  It was 6:48. That’s still 6 to Moise.  Don’t fight with him, I know someone else who says 6 is 6:00-6:59. Moise says where is this file?  In the folder you asked me to put it yesterday, Moise.  You didn’t even look to see if it’s there, and you’re fighting with me already?  It was fun though.  My sister told me something, but I did the opposite.  She said you never listen when people talk to you.  Moise said exactly.  Are you adding to a family fight Moise?  My birthday cake said, “Happy 10th Birthday Anthony.” At first, I was going to fight with someone thinking they wrote 100.  And then I realized it was only 10.  Somehow, I felt less offended by 10.  Junior says well you act that way anyway.  You used to say 5 Junior, so obviously I’ve doubled my age and maturity over the years.  Moise said the bakery probably saw how you act, that’s why they put 10.  Moise was saying he got this text today (Monday).  It’s from Friday Moise.  I’ve been fighting with you to get a better phone.  He says well, it says today.  But today was Friday so you’re now 3 days late with this text.  Joshua and Abby were quiet, and Moise says he hears no noise that means there could be a problem.  It can’t be that bad Moise like they’re not fighting, or we’d hear it.  I asked a question and it was for Junior.  Moise started to answer, but I cut him off immediately (not to start a fight but to get to the point).  I just needed an answer, not a whole explanation.  Moise said you think Junior would give a better answer?  No Moise but it would be more succinct.  He said did you say my answer stinks?  No, I said succinct.  Moise said Junior will kill him over this when he tells him.  I said nah he won’t.  He might fight a little with you playfully, maybe (want to) strangle you but killing?  No.  Junior is not a violent person.  Moise said 1 + 1 X 0 = 0.  I said without parentheses.  That doesn’t seem right.  I must google to remember all the rules from school.  He says you got a better answer.  Let’s not start a fight over it but let’s try to remember how to do math like in school.  FYI, the answer is 1 Moise.  Now I remember those math rules. Now when it comes to doing your timesheet, just remember I’m not going to fight you about doing it, but I will complain and whine and make you dislike me more than you do now if you don’t do it.  Please do your timesheet on time today and remember if you forgot 50% of what you learned in school then you have forgotten less than Moise and I have.

Have a great weekend!

Anthony